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2273Miles an amazing week -
RyanJBern Spring break is now over. It was the time of our lives but like all good things it had to come to an end. Thank you chevron adventure week. - RyanJBern "we did some historical ass shit"-kasey
- 2273Miles ive never been disappointed to be in ann arbor before now
- RyanJBern "i am going to try to shit,shower, and throw up." -kasey...spring break
- 2273Miles we've officially left the land of chevron. very sad. by happenchance we saw/went to a ton of them. great sponsor, cant say enough bout them
- RyanJBern Skyline chili. What what.
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kaseyk35 Insane in the membrane - 2273Miles they were holding church services in the conf room on our floor, not gonna see that @ the travelodge
- kaseyk35 "just walked around, moved every 'Do Not Disturb' sign from the door. Got everyone on floors 3-6. Genius" - RJB
- 2273Miles "lets get married. ok bye"
- RyanJBern O man escape from hotel. I fee like james fuckinbonds. He couldnt have pullled the shit i just did.
- 2273Miles "if you touch my dick im gonna fucking hit you"
- 2273Miles "what time is it? 222? i think we're in trouble. its ok. i think there will be hookers waiting for us there"
- 2273Miles "lets drive to louisville we'll make it for last call"
- 2273Miles "get off me i cant stand this shit" no one can resist this shit"
- 2273Miles "move the fucking car.... thank g-d"
- 2273Miles "with hookers and bed bugs? that means you ARE going to catch something"
- 2273Miles "you know cincinnati?" "fuck no" "so if i tell you where you'll have no idea what im talking about"
- 2273Miles "yea, we're just like the jonas brothers, except without that purity ring bullshit"
- 2273Miles i miss bama
- 2273Miles "do you need a fake tattoo?" "YES" "where do you want it?" (pulls up sleeve) (she applies w mouth)
- RyanJBern Haha they found a hotel and i am drunk. Bout damn time
- 2273Miles girl trying out for bengals cheerleaders: "its pretty intense"
- 2273Miles its a celebration bitches! we're transfering hotels: peace out hookers, pimps, love stains, and bed bugs. wow.
- RyanJBern Really. I am speechless.
- RyanJBern Im scared
- 2273Miles "none of you are packing? what the fuck is the matter with you?"
- RyanJBern Bokfest from hot waitress. O yah
- RyanJBern "there is nothing going on in cincinnati"-kasey except for the oldest collegiate beer festival in the country. Way to fail kasey.
- 2273Miles newport, the cincinnati of kentucky. good job kase. we're staying at the hotel from barton fink
- 2273Miles "who is this?" "michael buble. its a good song. bump it"
- kaseyk35 "Ill make her go to lapdance school"
- 2273Miles "what was the other thing we did today?...o wait nevermind"
- kaseyk35 2nd SEC football stadium today... Commonwealth Stadium at the University of Kentucky. Progression complete. Got on the field this time
- 2273Miles BEST. COUNTRY. EVER.
- kaseyk35 "I feel so American right now, I wanna get a gun" -CRF
- 2273Miles pour one out for colonel sanders
- kaseyk35 Currently going to the birthplace of KFC. Doin big things today
- 2273Miles just helped convinced a guys wife that that they should go into adult world just off the highway
- 2273Miles "i dont think those are video games"
- 2273Miles also, we'd like to thank chik fil a for sponsoring the chik fil a challenge for chevron adventure week
- 2273Miles in the words of tiger, "its not about what you achieve, its about what you overcome"
- kaseyk35 This is the camp david of having your windows open in the car. We have a tentative compromise
- RyanJBern "i said no to the refill because i was confused"-kasey
- kaseyk35 Still searching for the chik fil a...
- kaseyk35 The elusive search for a chik fil a continues
- 2273Miles if youre ever in knoxville, grab 5.95 and your aaa card and go to the womens bball hall of fame. surprisingly fun
- kaseyk35 Just got into Neyland Stadium, home of the Tennessee Vols
- RyanJBern I c't wait to snore to eake you guys up
- 2273Miles kasey not really helping our rep tonight
- 2273Miles "it's been a bad month for my face"
- kaseyk35 Rocky top... Not a bad showing
- 2273Miles "because you're ugly"
- 2273Miles meet me at bar its going down. not the bar, just "bar" knoxville has some creative bar owners/namers
- RyanJBern Four dollar fish bowls at bar
- 2273Miles rocky top, your girls arent the bama girls, but damn do you understand drinking
- 2273Miles ryan just unleashed his blue steel
- RyanJBern 'lets here it' 'herro'
- RyanJBern Its like a superpower. You are super drunk!
- kaseyk35 Ryan has the superpower of being super drunk
- kaseyk35 "Hail to the non-blacks" - RJB
- 2273Miles "and they were not willing"
- 2273Miles rjb, "winner" of the losers bracket. money CAN buy anything
- RyanJBern Depending on what kind of ducks
- RyanJBern Everyone is on the phone again. This is over
- 2273Miles "be famous for g-d"
- 2273Miles birmingham has redeemed itself and then some. true story. and we're not even including the fire at an old tire factory. TIRE FIRE!!
- kaseyk35 Standing on the oldest professional baseball field in america - rickwood field in bermingham. Alabama
- 2273Miles catch on the oldest ballpark in the country? sure
- kaseyk35 "I saw a sign over there that said 'city federal' and I thought it said 'Barely Legal' " - RJB
- 2273Miles bama governor, congressmen, ppl from white house, and us. birminhgam is the place to be today
- RyanJBern Just met gov of alabama and cooper antagonized all his secucurity. Sweet
- 2273Miles what do we have in common with alabama governor richard reilly (R)? we all love frequenting the vulcan statue and dealing with security ppl
- kaseyk35 Our main export is crippling depression
- 2273Miles in birmingham taking souveneir requests. who wants a vagrant?
- RyanJBern "I am going to have her hard wired to my brain. So whenever she thinks about me i will know"-cooper about his future wife
- RyanJBern I guess in the south you can not go out to the bars without a date. Hmm makes things very interesting...o yah army wives
- kaseyk35 The singer at innisfree in birmingham is pretty good
- 2273Miles "would you believe we played john denver already?"
- RyanJBern All i can about this night is wow.
- kaseyk35 The hypsies ladies and gentlemen... This town sucks. That's what we get for leaving a sure thing
- 2273Miles cops and cougars, homeless ppl and vagrants, tattoos and piercings, no one at bars, creepy dudes in trucks. hello bham
- RyanJBern Hotel highland expect the unexpected
- 2273Miles how are thursdays dead in a college town? step up uab, we're regretting leaving tuscaloosa
- 2273Miles we have a bid for oddest bar in the south
- 2273Miles "that would have crushed my arm"
- kaseyk35 Just got into alabama's football stadium. Cooler than ours and they are national champions
- RyanJBern Sty aj13styr
- RyanJBern Alabama is beautiful. Why did we go to school in michigan.
- kaseyk35 Sweet home alabama...heading to Tuscaloosa to check out the school then Birmingham
- RyanJBern "are you guys going to all the gay cities?"-man from shop
- kaseyk35 "He's a high maintenance bitch"
- RyanJBern "its hard" -kasey "thats the point. Its supposed to be hard"-cooper
- kaseyk35 "Big isn't always what it's cut out to be, you really need the money" - chef michael
- RyanJBern "Dont make a judgement call untill you swallow."-chef
- RyanJBern Get thee to a nunnery
- kaseyk35 "Listen, you're going to die, if some bacteria in food is going to kill you, it'll find you. Don't worry about it" - chef
- RyanJBern "we dont know how to cook" -me "i can cook anything" as the random old guy hands the recipe to his wife.
- kaseyk35 New Orleans school of cooking
- 2273Miles new orleans. where kasey just set the record for most guys flirted with in a night
- 2273Miles front door strip club promoters. great people. salt of the earth.
- 2273Miles "can u bring guns into bars here?" cop: "guns into bars? yea...if u wanna go to jail"
- RyanJBern I will own burbon st in a little bit. I have a rich uncle.
- 2273Miles "not nearly as expensive"
- kaseyk35 "We got mexicans"
- 2273Miles "the girls we hook up with are the entertainment I LOVE COLLEGE"
- kaseyk35 Massive Hail to the Victors on Bourbon Street... Then got called gay. Ouch
- RyanJBern "your not gay are you" to kasey from random girl on street who agreed with everything he said
- RyanJBern Kasey just dropped his
- RyanJBern She had a husband...who beat her. Wtf.
- kaseyk35 "I didn't do well in the 6th grade either, mom almost sent me to military school" - rjb
- kaseyk35 Ryan was "starstruck" by the new orleans hornets cheerleaders
- 2273Miles koozie. apparently prononounced "ka-zoo-e" means noise maker. courtesy of the @ryanjbern dictionary
- kaseyk35 Hey @Oneandonlycp3 were at ur game now in section 323. Roadtrippin from michigan can we get an autograph and a pic after. You're the man cp3
- RyanJBern Met the new orleans volleyball team. They loved us.
- kaseyk35 Magic show halftime? Seriously? This is ridiculous
- RyanJBern "call me Andrew Jackson cuz i won New Orlean" -cooper
- 2273Miles tonight is to the souped up car with a go blue bumper sticker next to a beat up p.o.s. w a buckeyes license plate (thanks jake)
- RyanJBern Its a gaunlett down here
- 2273Miles "i was just seeing how soft the pillow was, i couldnt feel shit"
- 2273Miles "its about sucking on their nipples"
- 2273Miles "not as good as you baby girl"
- 2273Miles "so we get to meet cheerleaders tonight" "oh year, i gotta do my hair"
- 2273Miles "just trying to stay faithful to my wife"
- RyanJBern Flight attendant
- 2273Miles oh you missed the show? i chugged a beer
- kaseyk35 Worst thing about chugging a beer is.. That you need another beer
- kaseyk35 Can gargle peanut butter
- RyanJBern Just got all you can drink and now we are doing drinking activities with the locals. Yes!
- kaseyk35 25 dollar unlimted daquiries and beer all day and jail
- kaseyk35 Father johns anaconda don't want none unless you got buns hun
- 2273Miles who lives above a voodoo museum? exactly who youd expect
- kaseyk35 Father john who works at the voodoo museum is the new creepiest guy ever
- kaseyk35 Voodoo museum. Still not as creepy as patrick from mardi gras world
- RyanJBern "i love horsies they are so much fun."-kasey
- kaseyk35 John goodman married annabeth here
- kaseyk35 Beignets at Cafe DuMonde
- RyanJBern I smell like strippers
- 2273Miles Ryan just woke up and blew a .09
- kaseyk35 Ryan just blew a .09 upon waking up...jesus christ
- kaseyk35 this is a different beast out here... i love @gabbous8
- kaseyk35 Worst rendition of ushers "yeah" ever. Even worse dancing by ryan
- kaseyk35 Searching for love rjb... Where else than ricks
- kaseyk35 Human beings
- RyanJBern Twitter lap dance
- 2273Miles 2 for 1. duh.
- RyanJBern You have to many feelings. Thanks kasey i will take my feelings to the grave
- 2273Miles "i got my dollar back"
- 2273Miles just taught a strip club promoter hiw to promote
- RyanJBern She doesnt love you she is a stripper
- RyanJBern I dont care if you are finshing me off. Lets get the fuck out of here.
- 2273Miles "and i love to see two bitches dyke"
- kaseyk35 thinks that @ogochocinco should come hang out with us on Bourbon Street in New Orleans... we'll see u saturday Chad dont leave us hangin!
- kaseyk35 bourbon street
- 2273Miles @RyanJBern is a standup person with morals and beliefs that most mothers would be at least okay with
- RyanJBern Is about to deck cooper.
- kaseyk35 "I will knock you on the Bourbon floor"
- kaseyk35 Best place ever
- RyanJBern Just cuz a girl wears a see thru out fit on stage doesnt mean she is a whore
- kaseyk35 U can 3 way or 4 way that b
- RyanJBern You can three way or four way that bitch
- RyanJBern I now know why my dad would not let me go to school in new orleans
- 2273Miles "girls wetter than post katrina new orleans"
- RyanJBern "fuck it i am bringing my phone with me i gotta tweet i gotta lot of followers"-kasey
- 2273Miles "you cant be intoxicated ..you can drink but not be intoxicated. its a fine line"
- RyanJBern Coolest hotel ever! Just like europe!
- RyanJBern Just saw mardi gras world. Nightmares for forever
- RyanJBern "i want that fucking cake so bad"-kasey
- kaseyk35 Very creeped out by the mardi gras factory
- 2273Miles creepy dude: "theres a string attached to the gingerbread man" ryan: "hahahahah" cooper: "why is that funny to u?"
- kaseyk35 Mardi gras world!
- kaseyk35 Hello New Orleans
- kaseyk35 Louisiana billboard - "Talk to me, I love you" - Jesus
- kaseyk35 Inglorious basterds... What a movie
- kaseyk35 "I'm just fucking thinking, shove a d*#*o up your ass"
- kaseyk35 Wow madison, mississippi... Nice pit stop and some great food
- 2273Miles ryan: "i am g-d's gift to earth" kasey: "did you forget to shave your left cheek?"
- kaseyk35 Madison, misssissippi... Home of nice gas stations
- kaseyk35 Thought ohio had nothing in it, then I came to mississippi and it might not be that bad
- 2273Miles Rain makes corn, corn makes whiskeyWhiskey makes my baby, feel a little frisk
- kaseyk35 New Orleans here we come!
- 2273Miles @kaseyk35 i think you mean you cost everyone 15 grand
- kaseyk35 won @2273miles and @ryanjbern 15 grand today. youre welcome
- RyanJBern .14
- kaseyk35 Use fucking verb tenses dumbass... Congratfuckinlations
- RyanJBern .12
- kaseyk35 Passed Geosci 105!... Obama here I come
- 2273Miles apparently this was neither the time nor the place for heroin jokes
- RyanJBern .10
- kaseyk35 Will be able to cook authentic new orleans style cajun food by this time tomorrow
- RyanJBern .08
- 2273Miles memphis has taught me that bass players can be the best musicians in the band AND the best people
- kaseyk35 Beale street all stars at bb kings in memphis... Livin the life
- RyanJBern .06
- kaseyk35 Last night on Beale street in Memphis
- RyanJBern .00
- 2273Miles if oj mayo chokes the ref then this will be the best trip ever
- RyanJBern "if we go to the midwest and dont see tje arches then the trip is going to suck," -kasey well i guess kasey's trip sucks cuz we aint go ...
- RyanJBern "dont go dancing with overweight bitches" thank you memphis local.
- RyanJBern I just made 15,000 dollars
- RyanJBern Rejection week has already started. Coop didnt get the job, and im afraid for our grant. It doesnt look good for us.
- kaseyk35 BAC has just been made into a verb
- kaseyk35 Hey kaylie, you from Tennessee??? Because you are the only Ten I See. Boom
- RyanJBern On the way to eat burgers made from 150 year old grease. I am not sure why i am so excited.
- kaseyk35 Graceland to the 3rd best burger in America. Dyers in Memphis, Tennessee
- kaseyk35 Good luck on surgey @THE_REAL_SHAQ the_real_shaq. Will you hang out w us in ohio on the tailend of our spring break... You can bring lebron
- kaseyk35 "Taking care of business in a flash" - elvis. That's a motto that rjb lives by
- kaseyk35 Graceland
- RyanJBern Walking in graceland
- kaseyk35 all we wanna do is be three of the first 100 people to do something with @ogochocinco in Cinci next Saturday.
- kaseyk35 maybe we'll find out what's in the box that rocks today
- kaseyk35 first name ever... last name slowest.... WERE SLEEPING IN MEMPHIS
- kaseyk35 wish she was walkin in memphissss hahahaha. love memphis. graceland tomorrow
- kaseyk35 beautiful
- kaseyk35 is
- kaseyk35 kaylie
- kaseyk35 cant catch a pass in Memphis... must be Michigan Wolverines
- RyanJBern Litterly the guy told me to punch him in the chest give him money and take a strip club card
- kaseyk35 Dear memphis... I could move here no joke
- kaseyk35 Sickest base player ever. Memphis stepping up and whiskey + pickle juice is amazing
- kaseyk35 "This tastes like batteries dipped in vagina" - Cooper
- RyanJBern To the band. "play party in the usa"-cooper
- 2273Miles thank you southerners for teaching us about chasing jack w pickle juice
- RyanJBern "jeff i need another fucking beer. Please"-gm of alfreds
- kaseyk35 Jack daniels and pickle juice... This is happening
- 2273Miles tennessee step your shit up, kentucky is murdering you in the best state ever race
- 2273Miles night 1 memphis brought to you by alcoHAWk, the best breathalyzer at walgreens
- RyanJBern "We have to stand for the fucking yankees"-cooper
- RyanJBern "i think that breathalyzer is a little off"-summer
- RyanJBern "i dont blow hard and i dont spit." -kasey
- RyanJBern No suprise here but it has been proven that i can hold my alcohol better then cooper or kasey.
- RyanJBern We just bought a breathalyzer. This can only go one way.
- RyanJBern Christianity is not an act! Salvation is not deserved! Money is not required*.
- RyanJBern Evelyn and brody plus best ribs in memphis equal best meal ever.
- RyanJBern "i think judiasm is wrong"-cooper
- RyanJBern Apparently in memphis kissing someone means you love them. Uh o.
- RyanJBern We just met charles barkley!!!
- RyanJBern Its tied holy shit aaaaahhhhhhh!!!!
- RyanJBern We just saw the sun sphere on tv. Here we come knoxville!
- RyanJBern Who is ryan miller?
- RyanJBern About to watch the game in memphis in an awesome sports bar. Go usa!
- 2273Miles "i think you two are the only jewish people in memphis" "no wait, theres a bank"
- RyanJBern "ryan stop hitting me. Every time you hit me my eyes close." -kasey "he is a turtle"-cooper
- RyanJBern It was between listening to music i liked and church radio. Cooper picked church radio.
- 2273Miles we live 20 minutes away from canada and we're driving to a canadian bar 10 hours away, in tennessee
- 2273Miles 5 gum is the official gum of chevron adventure week
- 2273Miles take it back. as good of an opening as forever has, we don't support women beaters..not even while we're in the south
- 2273Miles 102.5 the party has excellent choice
- 2273Miles make that patriotism
- 2273Miles out of gas, car now running on hope
- 2273Miles "i like old honeys"
- 2273Miles "sleeping isn't as bad as fucking ********"
- 2273Miles on our way out of louisville, a statue looked at kasey the wrong way, he punched it in the face
- 2273Miles excedrin and 6 hr drives=breakfast of champions
- kaseyk35 The odds of kasey ending up with miss universe at any point in his life are better than these 2 clowns waking up in 4 hours
- 2273Miles "BITCH you arrested"
- 2273Miles muhammad ali is a bad influence on crazy people going to bars w really late last call
- 2273Miles kentucky. where bars are open so late you can start strong, end up hating everyone you know, reconcile and still have an hour to spare
- kaseyk35 I don't think my seriousness about this gold medal game is understood... We will be in mememphis tomorrow by 3pm
- kaseyk35 First to get the free bowling shoes for the group... Check. "I'm the best of both of you"
- RyanJBern We just toasted to twitter. How fucking awesome
- 2273Miles dont hate the fake sign language speaker, hate the debilitatingly loud music
- kaseyk35 Hour wait to bowl? Bitch u know who I am?
- 2273Miles kentucky, thanks for leading the best state ever race
- 2273Miles Malt liquor and excedrin=the dinner of champions
- RyanJBern "what did he say"-ryan "i dunno he pointed at me so i laughed"-kasey
- RyanJBern Well they are not bad but i think cooper and kasey are going to kill me.
- kaseyk35 Punk rock country... When in Rome or Louisville
- RyanJBern Shit picked the wrong bar.
- RyanJBern "stop stabbing me its fucking scary"-cooper
- RyanJBern "you dont know me"-Cooper
- kaseyk35 Ryan just got a SPOONful of cooper
- RyanJBern "We cant leave untill i find my phone cuz i need to twitter."-kasey
- 2273Miles @kaseyk35 there was an end to that sentence that made it valid. u r not the goat
- kaseyk35 According to this conversation I am the Greatest of All Time
- kaseyk35 "I am Spring Break" - Cooper
- 2273Miles Soap bars weigh down styrofoam cups if you need to play quarters...in case you were wondering
- 2273Miles Will they deliver pizza by frisbee from next door? We'll find out shortly
- 2273Miles Hotel toilets and showers aren't on the same level. Toilets can flush a full grown chimp no issues. Showers are either freezing or scalding.
- kaseyk35 Chevron back in the good graces of the trip. They retain sponsorship, but they just dropped Tiger. How original
- kaseyk35 "Who would have known that when they came to the fight that they would be seeing the launching of the human satellite" - Ali
- kaseyk35 Floating like a butterfly stingin like a bee...The Greatest pf all time... Muhammad Ali
- kaseyk35 The Greatest pf all time... Muhammad Ali
- RyanJBern Going to the slugger factory. They got huge wood!
- kaseyk35 Churchill downs tothe home of the baseball bat
- RyanJBern Churchill downs is hopping!
- RyanJBern We are in cottage inn in louisville! Best place ever.
- kaseyk35 Fried Chicken in Louisville, Kentucky!
- kaseyk35 Whatup ben... Good start now en route to get ryan that elusive bat... Does the louisville slugger factory make pink bats?
- RyanJBern "you litterly look like a locker room"- Ben
- kaseyk35 You look like a lockerroom
- kaseyk35 Knoxville tennessee is where you are going to do die
- RyanJBern "I'm going to kill you hard"-Kasey
- kaseyk35 Indianapolis you're awesome...louisville sluggers in the morning. Wolverines running with the ponies tomorrow. Go fuck yourself san diego
- kaseyk35 Omg I have the most beautiful girlfriend in the world whatup kdawg
- kaseyk35 Dear btb you should serve bagels w all kinds of stuff on it late night.
- kaseyk35 I'm gonna parlay ryan getting punched first w him also being the first one who cries
- RyanJBern "kaylie is not adequate"
- kaseyk35 Eskimo sisters is a real thing... Sorry brooke
- RyanJBern "i have got to tweet cuz its been 45 minutes"-kasey
- RyanJBern I bought 4 girls drinks and didnt even get a number. Fuck
- RyanJBern Talked to a cop first. I win.
- kaseyk35 2 am and the bars are still open... Take a lesson aa
- RyanJBern "i tweet so hard"-kasey
- kaseyk35 Cancun can suck it... Indianapolis is where its at?
- RyanJBern "this trip has made me realized that i dont know where any of the states are"-Kasey
- kaseyk35 Just moved a car... So muscular
- RyanJBern First whiskey shot of the evans Williams adventure week!
- RyanJBern Still not at the bars and its 1. Its cool bars open till 3 am.
- kaseyk35 The house the eli's brother built... Night 1 here we go
- RyanJBern Kaseyk35
- kaseyk35 The girl from the booty pop commercial should not be having her booty popped
- 2273Miles "I'm hungry and when i get hungry i get cranky"-kasey
- kaseyk35 ocho cinco, shaq, ozzy guillen, looks like im in good tweeting company... NINO POR FAVOR
- 2273Miles "hold on i am twittering" -kasey
- kaseyk35 rock music to muted rap videos nice... o and 100 to 1 odds for me in Louisiana finally got some respect
- kaseyk35 Indianapolis, Indiana 2 to 1 to punch someone in the face... god damn reputation
- 2273Miles Haha just realized we are on highway 69.
- 2273Miles Whats brown huge and flashes you? ..... The nestle sign on highway 69 in indiana.
- 2273Miles Chevron was dropped as the sponsor. In a unsuprising move Evans Williams picked us up.
- 2273Miles New first. Played football in gas station while truck driver watched. Ryan cant throw or catch.
- 2273Miles 7 up store?? Who would have known such a thing existed.
- 2273Miles One hour in, 2772 miles left.
- 2273Miles Spring has already started. Ran out of cash and lost my credit card. Great start.
Tweetventure Week (The Twitter Files)
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